What You Get in Your Free Roast
Your free website roast is not a vanity score. It's not a green checkmark that says "good job" while your bounce rate sits at 80%. It's a brutally honest breakdown of why your site isn't working -- written like feedback from a friend who actually wants you to succeed, not one who's afraid to hurt your feelings.
When you paste your URL, our AI analyzes your landing page across three critical dimensions: first impressions, clarity of message, and conversion friction. You get back 3 specific, actionable things to fix. Not vague advice like "improve your UX." Real feedback like "your headline talks about features nobody asked for" or "your CTA button blends into the background like it's hiding from visitors."
Every roast includes a brutality score from 1 to 10, a plain-English summary of what's broken, and the three highest-impact fixes you can make today. Most people fix at least one thing within 10 minutes of reading their roast.
How the Website Roast Works
Three steps. No account creation. No credit card. No 30-minute onboarding call.
- Step 1: Paste your URL. Any live website or landing page works. We take a screenshot and start the analysis immediately.
- Step 2: Our AI scans your page the way a first-time visitor would. It looks at your headline, your value proposition, your visual hierarchy, your CTAs, your trust signals, and your overall page flow -- all in about 60 seconds.
- Step 3: You get your roast. Three hard truths about your page, each one with a specific recommendation for how to fix it. No fluff. No generic advice. Just what's wrong and how to make it right.
What the AI Experts Actually Analyze
The free roast runs your page through a conversion-focused analysis that covers the stuff most website owners are too close to their own site to see. Here's what gets checked:
Your headline and value proposition: Does someone understand what you do within 5 seconds of landing on your page? You'd be amazed how many sites fail this basic test. Founders spend months building a product and then write a headline like "The Platform for Modern Teams" -- which tells visitors absolutely nothing.
Your visual hierarchy and CTA placement: Where does the eye go first? Is it your headline, or is it that stock photo of people shaking hands? Is your primary CTA above the fold? Can a visitor even tell what they're supposed to do next? Most landing pages have a CTA problem. Either there are too many competing actions, or the main one is buried below a wall of text nobody reads.
Trust signals and social proof: New visitors are skeptical by default. If your page doesn't include logos, testimonials, case studies, numbers, or some form of proof that other humans have used your product and survived, you're asking people to take a leap of faith. Most won't.
Page flow and conversion friction: Does the page tell a coherent story from headline to CTA? Or does it jump from feature to pricing to a blog post to a random testimonial? Every element that doesn't move someone closer to clicking your CTA is a distraction that moves them closer to the back button.
Why Brutal Honesty Beats Polite Feedback
There's a reason founders post on Reddit and Indie Hackers saying "be brutal" and "tear my site apart." They've already asked their friends, their partner, and their mom. Everyone said it looks great. But conversions are still at 1.2% and they can't figure out why.
Polite feedback is useless feedback. "Maybe you could try a different color for the button" doesn't help when the real problem is that your headline makes no sense to anyone who isn't already inside your head. You don't need encouragement. You need someone to tell you the truth.
That's what this roast does. It doesn't care about your feelings. It cares about your conversion rate. The AI has been trained on thousands of landing pages -- the ones that convert at 5-10% and the ones that sit at 0.5%. It knows the patterns. It knows what works and what doesn't. And it will tell you straight.
We've seen founders completely rework their above-the-fold section after a single roast and double their trial signups the same week. Not because the AI is magic, but because it pointed out what was obvious to everyone except the person who built the page.
What Happens After Your Free Roast
The free roast gives you 3 high-impact fixes. For most people, that's enough to make meaningful improvements. But if you want the full picture, the Premium Roast ($27) goes much deeper.
The premium analysis runs your page through 5 different AI expert personas -- a CRO specialist, a UX designer, an SEO analyst, a copywriter, and a buyer psychologist. Each expert analyzes your page from their specific angle and gives you scored feedback with detailed recommendations. You get a full report you can hand to your developer or designer and say "fix these things."
And if you don't want to fix it yourself at all, the Done-For-You service ($490) means we rebuild your landing page from scratch based on the analysis. You get a high-converting page without the guesswork.
But start with the free roast. It takes 60 seconds, it costs nothing, and it'll tell you whether your page needs a tweak or a complete rethink. Paste your URL above and find out.